Dear Emily's Hair Folicles,
I understand you are doing your expected job of shedding the beautiful mane Emily acquired during her pregnancy, but would appreciate knowing when this fantastic shedding phase will end. It's been 3 months of this!!! I am sucking up more people hairs than dog hairs and my rollers look like overused hairbrushes. I was taken in for a cleaning last week and the guy thought I belonged to a hair salon.
Finish up already!